My Pastrami Experiment

h/t to @ribguy at http://j.mp/YFSZVe


I read so much about @TheGranarySA's pastrami. I tried it. Their pastrami was a pure #fail. Whole coriander seeds and peppercorns and mustard seeds left on the brisket. Who does that?

So I made my own (in pictures):

brine ingredients. 

the 13# brisket, separated into point and flat. 16 days for flat, 19 for point. 

de-brined flat for two days, changing water between days; patted dry then applied pastrami dry rub for two days.

then smoked it at 200 for 12 hours. then put in fridge for 12 hours. then steamed for 3 hours. let sit for 3 hours in steamer pot off heat with lid on. then carved.

pastrami up front, corned beef in back. 

this half flat gets wrapped, vacuum sealed and frozen for a future steam bath.

the pastrami and corned beef were amazing. if i can replicate this experiment, i will start a pastrami consulting firm.

Things I Must Do Tomorrow

Change the brine water on the corned point.

Smoke the flat for pastrami.

Plant that gorgeous upright rosemary plant I purchased today.

That's it.

Overheard in the Oval Office

Barack (on phone with Kim Jong Un): Kim. I'm tired of your shit. We ain't playin' your silly games any more.

KJU: Whaaaaaaat, muthufuckah????????????????

Barack: Launch snizzle on South Korean islands and I will destroy you.

KJU: Whaaaaaaat, muthufuckah????????????????

Barack: I have to earn my Nobel. So you know I mean it. I destroy your slave-state, and east Asia explodes in self-rule. Sure beats GWB's bullshit detour through the looking glass. Kim, trust me on this. I will fuck you up without permission of the UN, China or Russia. Do I make myself clear?

KJU: Whaaaaaaat, muthufuckah????????????????

Death Hits Home

We all enter this world bright-eyed.

It takes a while to understand that the only thing that really matters is enjoying today.

Invest. But understand your investments are not for yourself; they are for the betterment of humankind.

Don't be a dick.

Still Swimming

There's this post by @ReformedBroker that should motivate you to get your ass out of bed and become the most valuable member of your organization.

While I'm waiting for the apocalypse, I'm going to continue making my pastrami.

The brisket is still corning; fat side down. She will dry brine and smoke fat side up. Another day or two in the pool. Then 24-48 hours debrining. Then 48-96 hours dry brining. Then a short slow 4-6 hour live oak smoke.

Refrigerate for a day or two.

Steam up to temp in steamer rack. Hand cut slices.

[what i'm hoping for in my pastrami voyage]

An Attempt at Pastrami

I have a 13 pound brisket swimming in a nitrite enhanced brine. With the help of my SIL (a Bolner who grew up in a full service butcher shop), I separated the point from the flat. And then put together the dry ingredients.

Then I threw them in the pool, where they have been soaking since Sunday.

The point will be corned beef. The flat will be further processed into pastrami...another three to four day wait time. I don't have a lot of patience. But on this on single thing, I am out to prove that The Granary's concept of pastrami is wildly off base, and is just another misguided hipster attempt at relevance.

I'm only four days into this experiment, with at least another ten day's worth of anticipation. But I'm keeping copious notes.

[i should add that i am adept at wet and dry brining, as well as smoking a variety of brined flesh, including salmon and trout]

Roots

Half of my blood comes from Palazzo Adriano: http://goo.gl/maps/y44Wb

A trip to Prizzi and Corleone, up and down some very shitty mountainous roads, will take considerably longer than the 31 minutes it shows in Google maps. But, it's a great drive. And the people are friendly as hell, to a point.

PSA Don't ask about the mafia. Ever. That is so not halal, dude.