Summer in SoCenTX

you can spend a lot of time worrying about consequential shit. or you can let that consequential shit bury you. but you can't do both equally good. 

My Poor Bur(r) Oak

Waiting on results from the Bartlett lab to ID why my uphill burr oak is in distress. Here are some crazy (with a K) pictures:

While my downhill oak, planted on the same day 10 years ago, looks amazing. WTF?!

unhinged

i have started to become that guy. the unhinged retiree way too young to be the unhinged retiree. i only get this way when i find myself on post/base of my own volition. i saved a buck each on some quart lavender plants. and i saved five bucks each on some indoor napalm i am about to deploy inside my house (pesticide-free outside my walls, fwiw).

My Pastrami Experiment

h/t to @ribguy at http://j.mp/YFSZVe


I read so much about @TheGranarySA's pastrami. I tried it. Their pastrami was a pure #fail. Whole coriander seeds and peppercorns and mustard seeds left on the brisket. Who does that?

So I made my own (in pictures):

brine ingredients. 

the 13# brisket, separated into point and flat. 16 days for flat, 19 for point. 

de-brined flat for two days, changing water between days; patted dry then applied pastrami dry rub for two days.

then smoked it at 200 for 12 hours. then put in fridge for 12 hours. then steamed for 3 hours. let sit for 3 hours in steamer pot off heat with lid on. then carved.

pastrami up front, corned beef in back. 

this half flat gets wrapped, vacuum sealed and frozen for a future steam bath.

the pastrami and corned beef were amazing. if i can replicate this experiment, i will start a pastrami consulting firm.

Things I Must Do Tomorrow

Change the brine water on the corned point.

Smoke the flat for pastrami.

Plant that gorgeous upright rosemary plant I purchased today.

That's it.

Overheard in the Oval Office

Barack (on phone with Kim Jong Un): Kim. I'm tired of your shit. We ain't playin' your silly games any more.

KJU: Whaaaaaaat, muthufuckah????????????????

Barack: Launch snizzle on South Korean islands and I will destroy you.

KJU: Whaaaaaaat, muthufuckah????????????????

Barack: I have to earn my Nobel. So you know I mean it. I destroy your slave-state, and east Asia explodes in self-rule. Sure beats GWB's bullshit detour through the looking glass. Kim, trust me on this. I will fuck you up without permission of the UN, China or Russia. Do I make myself clear?

KJU: Whaaaaaaat, muthufuckah????????????????

Death Hits Home

We all enter this world bright-eyed.

It takes a while to understand that the only thing that really matters is enjoying today.

Invest. But understand your investments are not for yourself; they are for the betterment of humankind.

Don't be a dick.